Hello, Ted,
You must be in AVP now and not in your intensive stage treatment, so the chances are good that you will read my message…
This one is a delicate issue, but I know you will understand.
I suspect to be ill with one of those illnesses that are called incurable and just progress in time. I am not a nutcase, not a hypochondriac, the medical visit is scheduled soon, but I know already...
I have never felt good about Allopathic medicine and came to Avp last year, because the idea of a doctor seeing a suffering human being in you instead of an illness to be treated or discarded was very appealing. I took my time to metabolize the six weeks' experience at AVP and somehow today I can't help feeling that I was again a piece of an assembly line, in a different way from the classic experience with allopathic doctor/hospital, but still a piece of an assembly line… I enjoyed my time, and it was a new experience I wanted to have, yet there were small pieces here and there that were not quite matching.
I wanted to ask you if you had ayurvedic experience in other hospitals in India and if it is not a very invading question, why do you keep coming to AVP (I know that you consider Dr. Rv… an authority in ayurveda; we have talked superficially about this before) and not feel tempted or maybe tempted to try another hospital
Dear I…,
I always welcome hearing from you, your questions are deepening, rich, and in essence simple, which are the real questions. They also help me.
Dr. Rv… I trust within the level of my present understanding, but I cannot say he is an authority on Ayurveda - can there truly be such a one? If I had the wherewithal I would search more intensely than I have over the years, though I have sought from many in different countries.
I have returned here for the third time for as yet I have not found another place or human being of high degree with experience and understanding, that is not to say that I have ceased from searching, the feeling remains to continue questioning, ever deeper, but where to go from here?
The Yoga Therapy I have found helpful but here too the same applies, there is a tendency for the sacred to be made profane, a kiss to become mechanical, a vocation to become an assembly line business, you are sensitive to all this, thus the tears of suffering.
I am in the wonder of not knowing, but 'know' in my heart that I need help, maybe it would not be remiss of me to call it divine help, an essential need.
The content of your email I find achingly pure, so follow your intuition, try other places, I can but encourage you to keep searching, maintain a vertical direction in the midst of time and tribulations horizontal.
With My Love
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